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How women build relationships with men - two strategies

06-25-2018

Many brides in Ukraine and other countries have two favorite and ineffective strategies for communicating with men. Warm women tend to ignore their boundaries, and the principal women hide behind the façade of the inability to be responsive. Often, women who are inclined to fall into love dependence, in their relations with their men either expose very rigid impenetrable borders, or fail them, and let them into their territory too far, without worrying about their comfort and safety.

Different strategies

“I'm ready for anything for him, and he wipes my feet on me!”, "Let him suffer and prove that he is worthy of me! », «I never show interest in the first, it humiliates a woman!”, ” He beats, it means he loves.”, ”A man appreciates only the woman who ignores him.” All these different, but very familiar messages have one similarity: they have a clear distortion of the boundaries. Many brides from Ukraine and other countries (fortunately, not everyone!) have two favorite and ineffective strategies for communicating with the opposite sex in the love arsenal. Empathetic, warm brides often tend to ignore their boundaries, yielding in all important positions to the object of love. Women from Ukraine who loudly declare "dignity", demanding and principled often hide behind this facade the inability to be sufficiently attentive and responsive to the needs of their men. Some women are able to use, alternately or mixed, at once both strategies of love.

What to do in the existing relationship?

While the boundaries in relations are blurred - it is very difficult to separate one's responsibility: not to take extra, but not to shift one's own to a man. Women from Ukraine and other countries often sin by accusing all men - either, he says, too despotic, or too spineless, with all the consequences. But it does not lead to anything good or useful. The zone of your influence is not to try to change it, but in your work with your part of responsibility. Well, if a man is ready to go with you to a family psychologist. And the relationship can only be maintained with someone who will stand up and pick you up. And if he does not have a resource for this - then often brides discover that they are not ready to continue the relationship with such men. And it is very fair. When the dignity is normal - there are other partners who are attracted to it.

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